Working
Together
Sometimes our lives seem like nothing but work. We work when we
get to work, and we keep on working once we come home, cooking, cleaning, doing laundry,
etc. When will we find the time for our most important job: being a parent to our
children?
One way to share more time with your children is to involve them
in household work. Treat chores as a normal part of life, not as punishment. When children
help with family chores, they gain self-respect and learn competence. Kids feel good when
they see how they can contribute to family life. And when everyone helps with household
chores, there is more time for favorite family activities.
Everyone
can help. All family members can help in some way,
no matter how young. Toddlers can carry clothes to the laundry; preschoolers can carry
their dishes to the sink after dinner and put their toys up at the end of the day. With a
little training from mom or dad, older children and teenagers can manage more complex
household tasks.
·
Kids
choose. Chores can be laid out in choices, with kids selecting which
they will do. Disagreements are a good time to learn about turn taking and compromise.
·
Luck
of the draw. Write each
chore on a piece of paper in a can or small box (a tissue box is perfect). Each family
member chooses one or two slips of paper. This is an easy way for all to take turns with
the least and most liked jobs.
·
10-minute
pick-up. Give each family member a work area to
clean (e.g. kitchen, bathroom, or bedroom). Make sure everyone has the cleaning supplies
they need to do their jobs. Set the timer for 10 minutes and shout “Go!” When
time is up, allow a few minutes for last minute touch-up. Then stand back and join in a
round of applause for all who did so much in such a short time. A great lesson in the
power of family teamwork.
Cooking
time is for everyone. Some families develop
favorite meals because there’s a role for everyone. Tacos make a great meal for this
reason – even the youngest children can wash and tear the lettuce, school-age
children can grate cheese and cut tomatoes, and older children and teens can cook beans or
meat.
Work-n-talk. Remember the
conversations you had as a child with parent, sister, or brother while you washed dishes
or cleaned rooms together? Try sharing jobs with your children, so you can use work time
for family talks. It’s a natural time to share the day’s events, or to bring up
some of the serious matters you need to raise with your children. Or just share jokes and
laughter together.
Praise
and hugs. It’s
the effort that counts most when kids do family chores. A child’s version of a job
may not be as tidy as an adult’s, but it deserves praise and an extra hug.
What’s
next? Help
your children keep on task by following chore time with a favorite family activity –
a board game, a chapter in the family reading book, a walk with the dog, or popcorn and a
favorite TV show. Family members can join in the fun once their work is done.
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